“But Moses said to God, “Who am I that I should go to Pharaoh and bring the Israelites out of Egypt?” And God said, “I will be with you.”
{Exodus 3:11-12}
Moses, a Hebrew raised as an Egyptian who was on the run for killing an Egyptian, meets God for the first time in a bush that was on fire. With no small talk and very little in the way of introduction, Moses is given his calling. Go back to Pharaoh, who happens to want you dead, and command him to release the people of God out of slavery. Wow.
Naturally, Moses’ first question was “who am I to do such a thing?”. God’s answer to Moses’ insecurity? I will be with you.
In other words, who you are is less important than who will be with you.
The truth about most of us is that we would prefer to do what we feel capable of doing. We want to find what we’re good at and just stick with that, without wandering into places that wake up our insecurities.
The truth about God is that He rarely calls us to do what we’re most comfortable doing but rather, He calls us to do what will require us to rely on Him.
I am with you is not just a nice thing for God to say, it is His assurance that He’ll have our back. He will be there with all of His power, all of His authority, all of His wisdom, all of His strength – with all of Him. He’s not saying I’ll be there, watching it all unfold. He’s saying I’ll be with you in this thing. We will be together.
And He didn’t just say it to Moses. He repeats it over and over in His Word, and, it’s one of the last things Jesus said to His disciples.
“Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.” {Matthew 28:19-20}
What if Moses had said no? I fully believe that God still would have brought His people out of Egypt, because He is sovereign, and His plans cannot be thwarted. However, Moses would have missed out on what turned out to be the greatest relationship any man has ever had with God.
Father, I trust You. I pray that I will not seek out only what I am confident I can do in my own ability, but that I would be willing to go wherever You send me, do whatever You ask of me, knowing that You will be with me. I don’t want to miss a thing, Lord, not one thing that You want to give me, do with me or through me, speak to me, or work into me.
“After I made an inspection, I stood up and said to the nobles, the officials, and the rest of the people, “Don’t be afraid of them. Remember the great and awe-inspiring Lord, and fight for your countrymen, your sons and daughters, your wives and homes.” When our enemies heard that we knew their scheme and that God had frustrated it, every one of us returned to his own work on the wall. From that day on, half of my men did the work while the other half held spears, shields, bows, and armor.”
Nehemiah 4:14-16
Lord God, I pray that in our day, we will remember Your greatness and let go of our “fear of them”. I pray we will take our stand, and fight for our children, fight for family.
Mighty God, would You rise up on behalf of the children in this nation and the insidious, evil attack on their identity?! We cry out to You to intervene, for “So great is Your power that Your enemies cringe before You.”
“Let God arise, let His enemies be scattered”!
I pray for a mighty move of Your Spirit in this land that will turn the tide of evil, scatter darkness, and rescue all of those who are held captive by ideologies of wickedness. I pray that, with holy indignation, You will establish truth in this nation, and tear down the stronghold of lies concerning gender, marriage, family, and identity. I ask that You call Your Church to stand firm in this hour, to give no ground to the enemy and to actually begin to take ground, as You answer from heaven.
We will remember Your greatness, and we will not fear. We will build and we will fight. We will restore and we will protect. By Your Spirit. And by Your power, the darkness will turn. By Your power, schemes are exposed, lies are laid bare, and truth will prevail.
It was late and I was tired so I began to mumble quick prayers as I thought I was drifting off to sleep. But there would be no drifting. Scriptures began to pass through my brain, acting as a shot of adrenaline, and I knew God wanted to talk. He’s never tired like me and He doesn’t drift.
Then the man and his wife heard the sound of the Lord God as He was walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and they hid from the Lord God among the trees of the garden. But the Lord God called to the man, “Where are you?” (Genesis 3:8-9)
I searched for a man among them who would repair the wall and stand in the gap before Me on behalf of the land so that I might not destroy it, but I found no one. (Ezekiel 22:30)
For the eyes of the Lord range throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to Him. (2 Chronicles 16:9)
You have searched me, Lord, and you know me. (Psalm 139:1)
Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. (Psalm 139:23-24)
He had my attention and my thoughts began to do laps around my brain –
He searches for His people
I think You looked for me this year. Because it’s been quite the year, You know, and I don’t know the last time I’ve felt this tired. For at least the first half of the year, I was too tired to pray. Too tired at times to even drag myself into Your presence, into Your Word, preferring to join the lamenting and ash throwing and hand wringing. Fear was so tempting this year, Lord. Hiding from the chaos became hiding from everything, including You, because this year, this war, has been exhausting.
But I think You looked for me and it feels like you snatched me up, held me eye to eye and said it’s enough. Stop hiding, pick up your sword, stay close, don’t give up, I’m here.Remember and stop forgetting that I am good and I know what I’m doing and I love you and I will not forsake you.I made you and I called you to be with Me and “if you have raced with runners and they have worn you out, how can you compete with horses? If you stumble in a peaceful land, what will you do in the thickets of the Jordan?”
And I weep because You notice my absence. You know my tendencies and You put Your foot down and call me back up where I belong because You love me and my place is with You and this is only the beginning of the hard things so I can’t hide and I can’t just drift. And I missed You, Jesus.
He looks for an intercessor
I believe You found what You were looking for because Your Church has awakened and is yet awakening. This year catapulted us into the breach to stand in the gap for our nation. Forgive us, Lord, that it took thiskind of year to get Your people on their knees to intercede, to ask for Your mercy and for Your will to be done on earth as it is in heaven. Forgive us for our absence in the gap, that we left the wall empty of all but a handful of faithful watchmen. But now, Lord…
let Your eyes find Your devoted ones…
and strengthen our hearts. Give us the strength to stand, and put the wind of Your Spirit at our backs to move us forward as one people. We want to run without growing weary and walk without tiring out so strengthen our faith, Father. I pray for the devoted who feel unseen, unnoticed. Let them feel Your gaze as it lands on their devotion and fills them with strength to keep going. I pray they will be lifted up as they remember that You have
searched their hearts and You know them.
You know the depths of us and You love us and You look for us and You see us. You know every weary bone, our confusion and our weeping and our hiding and our longing to hear Your voice and know that You are near and that You see and You know. You know our coming and our going and our thoughts before they turn into words. And we have this place in us that yearns to know the depths of You, to know Your coming and going and Your thoughts and to see Your hand in everything.
Keep searching us, Father, revealing our every anxiety and offensive way and the places we’re hiding. Keep piercing our hearts with Your loving gaze so that they will look more like Yours.
He seeks and saves the lost and He leaves the crowd to search for one and He brings back the scattered and binds up the broken and strengthens the sick. He keeps vigil and He sings over us and watches over our way and though He searches, we are never hidden from Him.
And today I found this in my journal.
I was overcome with both gratitude and laughter because I had forgotten writing that at the beginning of the year. But God remembered and instead of allowing me to go through the motion of prayer as I drifted off, He took the time to remind me of this year’s searching and finding.
Have you felt God’s searching this year? Searching for your fellowship, your intercession, your devotion? Searching your heart, to make it more like His? If so, I pray He found what He was searching for and that despite the kind of year it’s been, you’ve been strengthened and encouraged to take the place you’ve been called to occupy, next to Him. If you have sensed His gaze but pulled away, let me say this – I know. I know that it can feel much easier to stay in the shadows than to come into the light of His searching. But I also know that the shadows are lonely and missing Him is the worst kind of missing anyone. So don’t pull away, don’t shrink back. The shadows aren’t hiding you from God, but they may be hiding God from you.
“Simon, Simon, behold, Satan demanded to have you, that he might sift you like wheat, but I have prayed for you that your faith may not fail. And when you have turned again, strengthen your brothers.”– Luke 22:31-32
It’s one of my favorites verses on prayer.
He could have prayed against the sifting. He could have prayed all the things we pray when the enemy picks a fight with someone we love.
But He would have been praying “No”, while the Father was saying “Yes”.
What Jesus did pray is so very telling. It reveals what the enemy was after in his scheming and sifting and the arrows he aims.
{Our faith has a target on its back.}
As I said in my last post, the devil isn’t trying to get us to not believe in God, he’s going after our trust in God. Our confidence in His goodness and His faithfulness and all that He claims to be.
Jesus knew what satan was after, so Jesus prayed for what satan was after.
Likewise, the Holy Spirit knows what satan is after, knows what the Father has said yes to, and what He has said no to, and knows what needs to be prayed.
Romans 8:28 ~ “In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans.”
Ephesians 6:18 ~ “And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people.”
Jude 1:20 ~ “But you, dear friends, by building yourselves up in your most holy faith and praying in the Holy Spirit…”
Satan wanted Peter’s faith. Jesus used prayer as a weapon against that scheme. Peter still got sifted, but discerning prayer protected what the enemy was really after, and caused that sifting to work for the good of not only Peter, but his fellow believers.
For some of us, our prayers are primarily requests for God to do what we think He should do, or, if we’re honest, what we want Him to do. And while we may follow it with ‘thy will be done’, our minds and our hearts are convinced, or at least hoping, that His will is the same as our will. I know this because I lived it for far too many years. Prayers that are motivated by the wants of our flesh are no kind of weapon.
Jesus knew that part of Peter’s sifting meant that Peter would deny Him. Deny even knowing Him, after everything they had experienced together. If it were me, I would have prayed that God would prevent the sifting, so that I wouldn’t endure the pain of the denial. Those are the prayers I prayed for years. Change him, so that my life will be easier and I won’t cry all the time. Let me get this job so that I can stop worrying about money. Get me out of this situation Lord, it’s so uncomfortable. Make them move so that I don’t have to deal with bad neighbors. Anyone else? No? Ok, just me then.
Our praying is a danger to the enemy when it is motivated by God’s heart, not our own. When it sounds like ‘Father, show him Your love for him‘ instead of ‘change him.’ When it’s our declaration of God’s provision and goodness instead of our fear of not having enough. His purpose vs our comfort. His love for our neighbor instead of their relocation. The plans and purposes of heaven instead of my politics.
This kind of praying doesn’t go unnoticed by heaven. Or by hell.
But I would rather be in the enemy’s crosshairs because I’m wrecking strategies of darkness, than be left alone because I pose no threat.
Be a threat, beloved. Pray fervently. Pray often. Pray His will, not yours.
P.S.– There is a place for praying for our own needs and even our wants. For casting all of our cares upon Him, in being anxious for nothing but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. That is not the kind of prayer I am addressing here. We have a good, good Father who inclines His ear to us when we speak to Him, cry out to Him, or just want to pour out our heart to Him. But when it comes to spiritual warfare, to the battle that rages against us, our families, and the Church – we need weaponized prayer. Prayer that calls down the heart and will of God. Prayers that echo heaven.
It was Wednesday morning, August 19th, and I woke up with a headache and feeling like I had a chest cold. By the next day, it felt like full-on flu, but unlike any flu I had ever had. On Friday I got tested and on Sunday that test came back positive for Covid-19.
The next week was the sickest I’ve ever been. It was the flu on steroids. My joints felt like they were full of broken glass. I had horrible night sweats, a constant headache, a cough that would not quit, and less than zero energy. I couldn’t even think straight. I had more than one serious thought that I might die from this virus.
On day 10 the turn around came. Not a huge turn, more like a slight curve, but enough to give me hope. My joints stopped aching so bad, and I was able to come out of my room for a bit and walk through the house. One walk-through and then I had to go back to bed, but it was something. With each passing day it has gotten better, and today, my only symptoms are some shortness of breath, extreme fatigue, and a narly brain fog that sometimes makes it hard to focus, hard to communicate well, and hard to remember things. The cough is rare, if ever, now. No body pain. Some occasional congestion. I’ve read that it could be months yet before I feel back to normal. That’s ok. I honestly feel lucky to have survived it at all. I am very fortunate to have a husband who took such good care of me, even though he too tested positive. His symptoms lasted a day and then were gone and he was back to normal, except for the fatigue.
I also have a lifegroup of women who cared for us both for the first two weeks, by dropping off a meal every day. I usually find it very difficult to accept help like that, but there were days that I don’t think we would have eaten if not for that meal. I could barely stand up for more than a couple of minutes, and both of us were too fatigued to move much at all at times. I am so grateful for a community of women who jumped in to do what they could, dropping off food at our doorstep every day. Oh, another symptom that is still with me – I cannot taste or smell things. Actually, the taste seems to be improving. If something is tart, tangy, or salty, I can taste that. Otherwise, I’m just eating because I need to eat. I also struggle with bouts of nausea and stomach pain. This thing is a circus full of fun.
But, I had (have) a lot of people praying for me, including my family, and I believe with all my heart that those prayers moved heaven on my behalf. So thankful.
Ok, that’s my Covid ordeal. I survived and I am recovering. But lemme tell you the good stuff.
Before day 10, I couldn’t do much more than mutter “Jesus, help me” numerous times a day. But once symptoms began to subside, the tide turned. Covid often made it hard for me to sleep at night, so I began having lots of late-night worship sessions. Those sessions turned into prayer times, as I climbed back up on the wall to take my post as an intercessor, albeit a weakened, sometimes nauseous one. And then, my appetite returned with a ferocity I hadn’t seen in a while. Not an appetite for food, but for the Word of God, as I began a renewed search for the heart of my Father. I found my gaze had turned from being consumed with Covid, off of what’s been happening in the political arena and in the streets of our nation, and back to Jesus.
All of this had actually begun before Covid threw me against the rocks. Now, it’s rising up like flames that just hit the kitchen curtains. Spreading, growing. Because God used Covid to fan into life an ember that had only begun to burn. While my body was surviving, my soul began to thrive and that means God had His way and the enemy did not. Any way you turn it, it’s good.
I did not start the flame. I did not will myself to want more of Jesus or to seek more of His heart or to re-engage in intercession. It was not by my own strength or persistence that I came out of the worst part of Covid with a revival going on in my soul.
God is on the move.
And oh my gosh haven’t we all just been waiting for it? As chaos increases and lawlessness is more brazen than ever. As the deception grows thick and rage is running the streets, we’ve waited for God to pull back the curtain and reveal the truth and put everything right. But what if we’ve been looking in the wrong place for the move of God? What if He wants to do it in us, instead of out there? Perhaps the shaking starts with us, those who are called holy and righteous and belonging to Him. What if we’re the ones with the curtain and the need for truth in our innermost parts?
What if Jesus is turning the gaze of the Church away from what’s happening in the darkness and fixing it on Him who dwells in unapproachable light?
There is not one thing going on in the world right now that is outside of the sovereignty of God. Not one thing is thwarting His plans or altering His purposes in the earth. He is who He says He is. He will do what He said He will do. He has built His Church on the truth of the Gospel, and the gates of hell will not prevail against it. Nothing is hidden from His sight. He will neither slumber nor sleep. He is making ready His Bride, to present her to His Father.
Turning her gaze back to Him. Making a way in her wilderness and streams in her desert. Allowing the sifting and praying for her, that her faith will not fail. Calling her to return to her first Love, to choose the better thing, to love Him with all her heart, soul, mind and strength.
We look away from the natural realm and we fasten our gaze onto Jesus who birthed faith within us and who leads us forward into faith’s perfection. His example is this: Because his heart was focused on the joy of knowing that you would be his, he endured the agony of the cross and conquered its humiliation, and now sits exalted at the right hand of the throne of God!
Hebrews 12:2 – The Passion Translation
What is God doing in you right now, in the middle of what you’re going through?
Pandemic. Something (a disease) that is prevalent over a whole country, or the whole earth.
Maybe you’re thinking the title to this post says that I don’t believe there is a real pandemic going on. That would be untrue. I 100% believe that Covid-19 is real, it is deadly, and it is a threat to all of us. That part is very clear to me. After that, it gets a little murky.
I recently posted a video on my Facebook page called Plandemic, the interview of Dr. Judy Mikovits, a scientist. In the interview she basically asserts that corruption in high places muzzles the research of scientists who’s discoveries threaten agendas. She also dances around the assertion that Covid-19 was manufactured and released on purpose.
I received a lot of feedback from posting that video. I discovered that a LOT of people are thinking what I’m thinking and that is that something is afoot. Something doesn’t smell right to us, not just about this pandemic, but about the response to it. I also got other feedback using words like propaganda, and conspiracy theories. I received articles from a number of people that refute Dr. Mikovits, and I read them all. Somewhere in all of it, there is truth and I think only God knows what that truth is for sure. Maybe Dr. Mikovits’ story was missing some facts. That doesn’t mean that researchers are not being muzzled by corrupt people in high places. It also doesn’t mean that Covid-19 was intentionally released upon the world.
Maybe I’m just part of a generation that is naturally suspicious of big government, big medicine, big things that lean toward serving their bottom dollar or need for power more than they lean toward our best interests. Or, maybe I’m part of a generation that has seen its fill of corruption and greed and lies coming from people in positions of power, so we don’t fall for every sincere statement they make and when something stinks, we know something is rotten.
Somewhere in the middle of the ones who believe that things are what they appear and that fear is the appropriate response, and the ones who are refusing to be herded off the cliff they think is just up ahead, is the truth. But after having a few days to ponder all of this, I’ve decided it’s not that particular truth that I want.
The truths of man won’t bring peace to my soul. Only God’s truth will do that. So here is what I know:
“But understand this, that in the last days there will come times of difficulty. For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, heartless, unappeasable, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not loving good, treacherous, reckless, swollen with conceit, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having the appearance of godliness, but denying its power.” {2 Timothy 3:1-5}
This world is not going to become a better place. The darkness will grow darker – that is an absolute truth and I will not be moved to believe otherwise.
“Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil.” {Ephesians 5:15-16}
I have come to the conclusion that the best use of my time is not trying to convince people that the world is evil, but rather in reminding people that God is good. No matter how much power men wield on this earth, it cannot compare to the power of God, and it is God’s power that gives me comfort and strength.
I do believe we are called to expose the deeds of darkness, but not necessarily by posting a video that I cannot know with absolute certainty is completely true. It was my natural suspicions being confirmed that prompted me to “expose” the darkness by way of posting that video. But my suspicions, even the valid ones, are not what God has told me to put on a lampstand. The mistrust so prevalent in my generation, even when valid, is not what God has given me for making sound judgments.
It is the Holy Spirit within me and the Word of God that will enable me to speak truth amidst the swirling myths, half-truths, uncertainties and suspicions that are thick in the air around us right now.
God is good and He is in control and He will use everything for His glory. I have nothing to fear and He will lead me and guide me through this or around it, whichever He chooses. He will be who He has always been, regardless of who men have become. If I have come to a place of trusting no man, I know I can trust my God. He does not lie, He does not deceive. I never have to wonder about His intentions or His motives. He remains faithful, merciful, and full of compassion. He is light and in Him there is no darkness.
The Word of God tells me that I live in a fallen world that will progressively become darker, but even so, I have a great hope in heaven, and a great purpose in this world. I need not try to make sense of what is going on in the dark, but I do need to be alert, fully awake, and praying.
It is not the schemes of men that God has admonished me to recognize.
“Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes.” {Ephesians 6:11}
“Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.” {1Peter 5:8}
So for all of those who raised fists in the air in agreement with my suspicions, thank you for your solidarity. And for those who pushed back, thank you for your willingness to do so. It is because of this push and pull that I sat down with God to seek what is true and received His staff and His rod repositioning my heart back where it belongs. In His word, in His truth. Fighting the right battle, and the right enemy.
Because we are growing ever nearer to the end. Will it be in my lifetime? Maybe, maybe not. The time is not for me to know. But I can know the signs. I can know that wading into the muck and mire of what is happening in the physical realm, will not equip me for what is needed in the spiritual realm.
Birthright designated who would assume leadership of the family, and who would get the largest portion of the inheritance. The birthright belonged to the firstborn son.
But the blessing was different. With the blessing, the father could designate whichever child he wanted to receive the bulk of the inheritance, and could give him power and authority so that, in essence, the birthright was nothing more than a title worn by the first son.
In Genesis 25:23, God said this to Rebekah (emphasis mine)-
"And the Lord said to her, ‘Two nations are in your womb, and two peoples born of you shall be divided; one shall be stronger than the other, the elder shall serve the younger.’
This is why we now read in chapter 27:36- “Esau said, “Is he not rightly named Jacob? For he has cheated me these two times. He took away my birthright, and behold, now he has taken away my blessing.”
Isn’t it quite possible that we have blamed others for something God Himself orchestrated?
{Perhaps we would be better served to be slower to accuse, slower to assign blame, and much quicker to seek God, the sovereign mover of hearts and assigner of blessings.}
The deception was so thick in this story, and the emotions of Esau were hard to watch. Betrayal, sadness, grief, anger- they were all felt so strongly, and could easily dominate this story for us. But there is something else here that I want to try to pull out.
The scheming and lying of Jacob and Rebecca were to get something for Jacob that God had already said was his. Before he was born, God had determined that Jacob would receive the birthright and blessing of the first-born, even though Esau would be the actual first-born.
The question:
What have I spent so much time and energy trying to get, that God has already said is mine? And I am posing the same question to you.
Love. Acceptance. Identity. Blessings. Security. Hope. So much more. Things we no longer have to try to get, for they are already ours in Christ.
One of the saddest sights, in my opinion, is that of a child who is trying to gain the love and attention of a father.
I wonder if God feels the same way.
Today would be a good day to sit down and consider what you have been chasing, that you have actually already been given.
Karla Jo Wasion 