Category Archives: Blog

the things of God

He was in our midst. Listening. Watching. Whispering. None of us saw him there, except Jesus. Jesus heard. Jesus knew. 

“From that time on Jesus began to explain to his disciples that He must go to Jerusalem and suffer many things at the hands of the elders, chief priests and teachers of the law, and that He must be killed and on the third day be raised to life.  Peter took Him aside and began to rebuke Him. “Never, Lord!” he said. “This shall never happen to You!”  Jesus turned and said to Peter, “Get behind Me, Satan! You are a stumbling block to Me; you do not have in mind the things of God, but the things of men.”

 Then Jesus said to his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. ” Matthew 16:21-24

We like to wonder. We wonder if Satan knew from the beginning that Jesus’ death would bring about his defeat. I’ve sat in on numerous discussions of wonderings. “No, he couldn’t have known. He is not omniscient.” “He knew. That’s why he was trying to kill Jesus ahead of time, to stop Him from going to the cross.” “He probably knew some things, but he didn’t know the whole plan.” We wonder, and then we move on.

But today I couldn’t move on. I stood there listening to Jesus address the unseen one speaking through Peter. Whether Satan knew the whole plan or not, Jesus had just announced part of it. Satan knew that it was the will and the plan of the Most High God for Jesus to go to Jerusalem, be killed and then be raised to life.

And surely Satan knows that any plan of God’s will not end well for him.

And so I wonder. What has Satan tried to stop in my life? What part of my destiny has he overheard, and whispered “No!”, because he knows that my destiny fulfilled will not be good for him?

How has he tried to convince me that sacrificing myself on behalf of someone else isn’t in my best interest?

How many times have I been persuaded that doing the hard work of dying to my own needs and wants isn’t what God requires?

Dying to self. Loving the the one undeserving of love. Showing mercy instead of judgment. Praying for the one who hurt me. Doing what is right instead of what is easy. Fighting for a relationship I would rather walk away from. Turning the other cheek. Giving when I have little to give. Pushing through when I’d rather give up.  Being open and vulnerable when I would rather hide and self-protect. Believing for the impossible instead of settling for the possible. Choosing brokenness and humility over my pride.

Picking up my cross. Losing my life for Christ.

The things of God and the things of men.

And in the midst of God’s people, there is one who is whispering “No! Never!”.

May I, may we, the Church, learn to discern. And may our voice be heard echoing through the realms of darkness…

“Get behind Me, Satan!”

it’s not about clean hands

Matthew 15:1-20

This is my continuing journey through the gospels, standing among the disciples of Jesus, watching, listening and discovering Him anew.

There we were, surrounded again by hoards of people. Well, Jesus was surrounded. The people weren’t there to see us or touch our clothes. Good thing, since I think most of us were still stunned by the whole “He walked on water and oh my goodness He really is God’s Son” worship event that had taken place earlier. Our minds are blown and life is so different now and we’re just trying to keep up with this Man that everyone wants to touch.

So yeah, there we were, and here they came. You couldn’t miss them if you tried. Everything about them was intended to say “I am above you, get out of my way”. Pharisees. All dressed up, heads held way too high, making every attempt to not actually touch any of the unclean, common people. They came with a bone to pick with Jesus. “Why do your disciples break the tradition of the elders? They don’t wash their hands before they eat!” (Matthew 15:2)

I nearly bit my tongue off to keep from laughing at the topic of their confrontation. Hand washing? Really? That’s what has your robes in a bunch? Yes, yes it is. The great rule (tradition) of washing up before supper had been violated and someone had to answer for that. So Jesus would answer. I leaned in close so I could hear Him give it to them.

And give it to them He did.

“Jesus replied, “And why do you break the command of God for the sake of your tradition? For God said, ‘Honor your father and mother’ and ‘Anyone who curses his father or mother must be put to death.’ But you say that if a man says to his father or mother, ‘Whatever help you might otherwise have received from me is a gift devoted to God,’  he is not to ‘honor his father’ with it. Thus you nullify the word of God for the sake of your tradition. You hypocrites!” (v. 3-7)

I suppressed a giggle and the urge to high-five my Savior. Which is good, because in a minute I wasn’t going to be in the mood for a high-five.

He called the crowd to Him and began to teach them…

““Don’t you see that whatever enters the mouth goes into the stomach and then out of the body? But the things that come out of the mouth come from the heart, and these make a man ‘unclean.’  For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false testimony, slander. These are what make a man ‘unclean’; but eating with unwashed hands does not make him ‘unclean.’”     (v. 17-20)

Suddenly I was alone with Him, encountering truth as He spoke to me…

“Karla, clean or unclean isn’t about your hands, it’s about your heart. Unclean comes from the inside, and eventually, it shows up on the outside. Because unclean doesn’t stay hidden safely away inside where others can’t see it. It comes out. People have different names for what makes them unclean. I give it one name.”

“I have a problem with my thought-life.”  “You have a heart problem.”

“I need anger-management.” “You have a heart problem”.

“I struggle with sexual issues.”  “You have a heart problem”.

“I need to learn to control my tongue.” “You have a heart problem.”

You can wash your hands all day everyday, but what you have is a heart problem.

But remember…

“I will sprinkle clean water on you, and you will be clean; I will cleanse you from all your impurities and from all your idols. I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. And I will put my Spirit in you and move you to follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws.” Ezekiel 36:25-27

Stop staring at your hands. Bring Me your heart.”

i learned a new word today

“Now when He saw the crowds, He went up on a mountainside and sat down. His disciples came to Him, and He began to teach them…” (Matthew 5:1-2)

So I went too, because I want, need, crave His discipleship. At first, I just listened to the cadence of His voice because, frankly, I had heard these words before.  The temptation was there to just move on. But something was pushing at my brain, clamoring to get in.  I kept listening, making Him repeat every word over and over because something was there and it wanted in. And then a list started forming in my head. Books. Drugs. Alcohol. Men. Marriage. Children. Church. Gifts. Purpose. Calling. (Stay with me, it will all make sense eventually. Hopefully.)

And then the door flung open and there it was. On this mountainside, Jesus turned “happy” on its’ little head. My list has a title – “My Search for Happiness”. And the whole world has a list because those who bear the image of their Creator are on a continual search for “happy”. So here, on this mountainside with my mysterious Friend, I felt the ground shift ever so slightly. I put Jesus on repeat, slowed down His voice and just listened.

“Blessed [happy]are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven”.

Happy happens when you know full well that you have no power, no authority what so ever, apart from Jesus. There’s no revelation, no movement, no healing, no freedom, no salvation…nothing in you. So you continually have your hand out to God. And in that place…knees to the ground, hand out, fully aware that you have nothing…He gives it all to you.

A spiritual beggar has more power and authority than any other person on earth. And that makes them happy. Happy to be poor in spirit, because when they walk in that, heaven comes down. Healing happens, for real. Darkness is overcome, for real. People are set free, for real.

I listened to Jesus today, and realized that I know too many words. Calling, destiny, gifting, purpose. Good, useful words, except when they spell happiness. When they eat away at my spiritual poverty, they become dangerous.

My search for happiness started early, as a little girl who discovered the wonderful escape route of books. The search looked different as I became different, and you would think that it would have stopped when Jesus found me. And actually, it did, in part. I have a deep joy in me that nothing can touch, thank You Jesus. But I’ve still looked for “happy” and simply exchanged words like “drugs and alcohol” for “calling” and “purpose”.

The disciples went to Him as He sat on the mountainside, and He taught them. I was there. I learned a new word.

Poor

 

 

 

 

**Disclaimer time:  I know that the Beatitudes are speaking, at least in part, of those who will receive salvation. But I have asked Jesus for more. For deeper. I believe that the word of God is relevant to me every day of my life. If it is only referring to salvation, then these verses in Matthew would no longer be relevant to me, because I have salvation. So today’s post is simply what I heard Jesus speaking to me, for me, today. I’m not trying to make up a new doctrine.

i need to know

The news spread. People were bringing others with them, and soon there was quite a crowd. There were sick people everywhere…because they had heard. People in pain, some having seizures, some paralyzed. And, really? Yes, really. The demon possessed were there. Oh, it was all very messy. Very unsanitary. Strangely enough, He didn’t seem the least bit uncomfortable.

He healed them. All of them. Even the messy ones. And the crowd kept coming, growing, following Him. 

nail pierced hand of Jesus editedI’m trying to watch it all through the eyes of a disciple. Who is this man Jesus, this magnet for broken and messy people? This One with beautiful mercy for the pained, the shaking, the sick-to-the-bone and out-of-their-mind ones? They saw healing flow from beautiful hands that would soon be wrecked by the nails of their sin. But they didn’t know that yet. They only knew that He was willing to touch messy and broken. He became the destination for the desperate and the desperate left healed. And the eyes of a disciple grow wide.

Because I know. I know those hands with their scars and the nails that put them there. I know beautiful mercy. I know the willing touch of the Healer God who beckoned me to follow Him and now we’re standing in the midst of messy and I need to know what I know. Love heals broken. Mercy triumphs over judgement. Holy came to unholy to make it holy. Scarred hands are beautiful and blood washes clean and God came to messy people because messy people need God.

And if I’m going to follow Him, I need to know. 

“Jesus went throughout Galilee, teaching in their synagogues, preaching the good news of the kingdom, and healing every disease and sickness among the people.  News about Him spread all over Syria, and people brought to Him all who were ill with various diseases, those suffering severe pain, the demon-possessed, those having seizures, and the paralyzed, and He healed them.” Matthew 4:23-24

at the beginning going low

I was going to skip the genealogy (as I usually do). But I was determined to start at the beginning, so I read every single “father of…” in the first 16 verses of Matthew. And then I went back. Something in verse 5 caught my eye.

“Salmon the father of Boaz, whose mother was Rahab”.

woman's eyeA prostitute of Jericho. Her story is in the second chapter of Joshua. Two spies sent by Joshua to “look over the land” stopped at her house, and her life would never be the same. She had no idea that their decision would place her in the lineage of the Messiah.

To the people of Jericho, Rahab was probably just another prostitute. I wonder if she ever came to understand that she was so much more than that to God.  Did she ever realize that in the small decision the two spies made to stop at her house, God’s plan for her took flight?  She saved them with a lie, they saved her through a scarlet cord. She lived among the Israelites for the rest of her days, giving birth to the famous Kinsmen-Redeemer, Boaz, and becoming the great-great grandmother of King David. Not only is she listed in the genealogy of Jesus, but her faith is mentioned in the books of Hebrews and James. To Jericho, she was just a prostitute, but God knew her. And He made sure we would never forget her.

It all began with the decision to stop at the house of a prostitute.

And God whispered a word and brought a memory with it. “Significant.”

My son was going to college in Waco, Texas. His older sister was here with us in Illinois. A prodigal, still living in the far country. One day my son was sitting outside on campus and prayed for his sister. He heard God tell him to invite her to move to Texas, so he called. She said yes and moved to Waco.  She joined his church community and God caught the heart He had been pursuing. She is in Uganda now, obeying His call to go to the nations. The prodigal has returned home to the Father and is now wildly running her race with Jesus. Because a brother prayed for his sister, and then obeyed the voice of God and picked up the phone. Small decisions, a prayer and a phone call. But in the hand of God they changed a life that is now changing other lives.

I went back to the beginning, and find myself sitting in the genealogy of Jesus, filled with an awe that makes it hard to breathe. Because God is huge and an encounter with a prostitute changes everything and a prayer and a phone call can change a life because everything matters and Who is this God who does these things?

And then awe deepens and I go lower.

Because I have lived my whole life feeling insignificant.

And I feel His gaze and go lower still. Because I came back to the beginning and He met me here and something is shifting and what else do you do when God is looking but go lower? What do you do when God shows up in the “father of…” part of the beginning and speaks healing over you? When your mind is bombarded with the knowledge that everything matters?  Phone calls and prayers and prostitutes and a scarlet cord and you, yes you. Your life, your love, your pain, your prayer, and your hunger for more. All significant in the plans and the hands of God.

You go low and you weep at the wonder, and significance, of it all.

because

For roughly three years Jesus poured Himself into followers.  Teaching, loving, displaying God-power, rebuking, laughing, weeping. Living life. Pouring into people who would turn around, pour it back out, and change the world. Ordinary people who watched, listened, and followed Jesus and became transformed. Lives interrupted by God, taking them from ordinary to radical. And it has left me longing.

For a life interrupted. A life discipled by Jesus.

So back to the gospels I go. To the beginning. To hear with my eyes and receive in my heart transforming discipleship. I will write what I learn because that is the compulsion that lives in me. But I don’t want to just have something to write about. I want something to live about. Something that turns ordinary into radical.

Why now? I’m 51 and have been following Jesus for twenty-two years. Why now am I going back to the gospels to learn Jesus all over again?

Because God didn’t breathe the words “retirement” or “no longer relevant”.

Because I believe the best is yet to come.

Because I like the chase. And so does He.

Because I know He can take my breath away. Breathless. I want that again.

Because He is enough but I can’t get enough of Him.

Because He is more and I want more.

Because I’m not ready to sit down and be quiet. Because I’m a middle aged dog and I want new tricks and Jesus is always teaching, always discipling.

Because the Gospels fascinate me. Fascinated with Jesus. I need that again.

Because there is more and I’m not done yet.

rememberings and flames and a sovereign God

“Word of God speak”. With that request and a cup of coffee nearby, I open my bible and it falls open to the worn, ink marked pages of Matthew. I flip to the Psalms. Then to Samuel. Quiet. Unlike my anxious thoughts and wonderings of late. Little fears murmuring away in my heart.

So I settle back into Matthew. Into familiar, beloved words, thinking surely I will not hear Him speak from here, the book I have studied more than any other. Oh the foolishness of me.

Mary is pregnant. God’s promised plan of redemption is full on in motion. But  Joseph is planning a divorce. So God sent a dream. To fulfill a prophecy.

“But after he had considered this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, “Joseph son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife…All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had said through the prophet:  “The virgin will be with child and will give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel”—which means, “God with us.” (Matthew 1:20-23)

Redemption is born and Magi want to worship. And a king wants to kill. So God sent a dream. To fulfill a prophecy.

“When they had gone, an angel of the Lord appeared to Joseph in a dream. ‘Get up,’ he said, ‘take the child and his mother and escape to Egypt’…And so was fulfilled what the Lord had said through the prophet: ‘Out of Egypt I called my son.’” (Matthew 2:13-15)

An evil king dies and the Redeemer returns to Israel. Because God sent a dream. To fulfill a prophecy.

“Having been warned in a dream, he withdrew to the district of Galilee, and he went and lived in a town called Nazareth. So was fulfilled what was said through the prophets” “He will be called a Nazarene.” (Matthew 2:22-23)

Redemption birthed. Prophecy fulfilled. And with my eyes, I hear God speak.

Sovereign.

“What I have said, that will I bring about; what I have planned, that will I do.”    (Isaiah 46:11)

And in my heart a flame flickers…

as I remember whispered words. Promises made by the Promise Keeper.  My fingers rush past Matthew and the flame glows and moves with the breath coming from the page.

“The LORD Himself goes before you and will be with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you.” (Deuteronomy 31:8)

He will keep you strong to the end, so that you will be blameless on the day of our Lord Jesus Christ.” 1Corinthians 1:8)

“…He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 1:6)

“The LORD will fulfill his purpose for me; your love, O LORD, endures forever…” (Psalm 138:8)

Sovereign. Still. Yet. Continually. Until finally.

“Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea.  I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Now the dwelling of God is with men, and he will live with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God.  He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.”  He who was seated on the throne said, “I am making everything new!” (Revelation 21:1-5)

The flame burns. Murmuring fears and nagging doubts cringe from the heat. As I remember.

The Word of God speaks, and God keeps that Word.

 And what of you? What has God spoken over your life? Does it seem long ago and far away? Have you forgotten? Remember! Hold fast to God! What He has spoken, He will surely bring about; what He has planned for you, He will surely do!